What could have happened...

[erickson]

"Try straight," she said, eyes closed and tired

"Blunt? Okay. How does 'I love you' sound?" came Jeff's voice on the other end of the line.

"OK, we've got a problem, then."

Again, there was silence on the other end of the line.

"We're both Jedi."

"Passion, yet Serenity." Jeff quipped.

"JEFF...That ISN't how the Code goes!" her voice sounded strained.

"Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet Serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet the Force." Jeff quoted, and it clicked in Astrid's memory. It was the older code, the one that the first Jedi had followed.

"Jeff, you're just making this harder," she said.

"You're saying that you don't feel anything for me?" he asked, the voice strangely flat.

"No, I'm saying I SHOULDN't" she exploded.

"So I'm making this harder because I share your feelings?" he asked. "Jedi used to marry Astrid, and several still do."

"Most interestedly, they've all been Corellians..."

"Knights do, Jeff, occasionally, and when the council says they may. but Masters don't"

[erickson]

"Only because none have tried. Timothy and Kathryn are going to need to marry anyway.

"Why? said Astrid

"Because she's pregnant." he explained.

"And what says you shouldn't marry?" he asked.

Jedi generally don't, she said. it leads to too much attachment, and biased judgment.. It leads to Jealousy

"Show me one thing in this galaxy that isn't biased, and I'll give you immortality." Jeff said pointedly.

"Jeff, we'll talk later, right now I'm tired.

"Astrid, I want to be with you, at your side. And I'd like you to be at mine. In a life of servitude to the galaxy, I don't think I'm asking for much." Jeff said fairly.

"All I'm asking for is for you to sit down and talk with me. And if now isn't the time, when will it?"

"Jeff. I really do need time to heal. We can talk then," she said, feeling dizzy.

There was silence again. "As you wish, Master." he said, sounding fairly hurt. "You going to call me, or should I call you?"

There was no answer, only a thump. "She's fainted, Jeff," said the Bird after a long silence.

"Ah, dammit." Jeff heard a male voice. "Okay Astrid, into bed with you."

"Who's there?" Jeff asked.

"AAH! Oh, hi. Didn't realize that Astrid was talking with someone. It's Ox here, I heard a noise and came to investigate."

"Oh. Well, tell her to call me when she next gets the chance, okay?"

"Will do kid."

And with that, Jeff signed off.

[Morris Cutler]

*Callista lay sleeping in her quarters, recovering from the ordeal of the day. Silently Gavin padded into the room, and walked towards her. When he reached her bedside he kneeled next to her and smiled for a moment.*

*He was unsure of the new feelings he was experiencing but he wanted to see her, something inside of him told her he needed to see her. She was peaceful, her breathing was rythmic and Gavin watched her quietly for close to an hour.*

*He knew he was taking a calculated risk even thinking about her, but it was worth it he told himself. With the collapse of the Jedi Order everyone needed the ones they loved most. Love, was that the word he was looking for. Yes it was he felt.*

*Impulsively he kissed her on the forehead, and spoke to her sleeping figure.*

"Don't worry now, I am always going to take care of you."

*then he turned and started slowly walking out of the room.*

[Quinn]

Jeff walked through a dark hallway, lightsabers in both of his hands. The corridor was black, lit with ancient oil torches, giving the place a Gothic décor. He felt that he could not move except forward, muscles moving without my command.

An ancient, ornate wooden door seemed to appear before him, five times as tall as Jeff was, and was as wide if he stood in the middle and stretched my wings to either side, right to their maximum. He looked it up and down, remembering his mission here.

His master had gone to the dark side once more, chasing one of the Fallen Twenty, the newest one, Gr'y, now calling himself Darth Ust. He thought it an idiotic name, but one only had to add an 'L' to the name to really get an idea of why Gr'y fell in the first place. But Astrid had gone after him as soon as she found out he had turned from the light, found him, and killed him, but his Master had been too much for her, Jeff theorized.

And now Jeff Raven, not even a Jedi Knight, was here to drag Jedi Master Astrid Erickson back to the light side of the Force. And if he couldn't, he was to bring her back to stand trial. But he was certain that she would not have to, as I put my hand towards the door, and punched through it with a telekinetic blast. Good thing too, as there was a poisoned spring-loaded dart that would have launched if Jeff so much as touched it in the wrong place.

Within the room, it was very opulent, almost like a royal bedchamber. And on the royal bed, laid Astrid, who now had jolted upright to see what the commotion was, lightsaber in her hand. She had dyed her hair a darker shade of red, seeming to be almost made of blood, no longer tied back, but loose down her back and two bolts down her front to cover the tops of her breasts. Her eyes seemed darkened by the mascara and eye shadow she used now, and the lipstick made her lips prominent, if darker. Her clothing made her even more alluring, a black corset, g-string, garter belt and nylons made his Master and mentor seem like someone's plaything, or a model meant for the centerfold of a men's pleasure holo.

“Who dares!” she challenged, then stopped, seeing Jeff emerge from the darkness, black wings, blue hair and ghostly white skin making him seem more like the angel of death than her savior. “I shall have your head! GUARDS!”

“They won't be coming.” Jeff spoke, and Astrid's eyes widened as she recognized the low, yet smooth voice, as he stepped over the splinters of what used to be the door. “Archangel is a rather thorough man.”

“Then my Master will-” Astrid started to say before Jeff silenced her with a smirk of his own.

“You mean Samuel? He was a decent fight, and even tried to lure me to the dark side several times, promising me many things. The galaxy, unlimited power... you.” Jeff snorted. “But he denied my offer to save him, however much I loathed giving him the chance.”

“And you killed him?” Astrid laid upon the bed, stomach down to give Jeff a good look down her breasts. Jeff was distracted for all of a microsecond before he continued.

“No.” Jeff answered. “As I stated previously, Archangel is a rather thorough man.”
“He's here?” she asked suddenly, her face paling very quickly. She seemed to fear Archangel, and for good reason, Jeff thought.

“Oh yes. And he isn't too pleased with you, going off and falling to the dark side.” Jeff smirked. “But he's allowing me to deal with you, and to make you an offer.”

“Jeff, I warned you not to follow me!” she growled, swinging her legs over the side of her bed, slipping into low, flat shoes. Meant for fighting, yet giving her a grace as her hips swayed to and fro, subtly reminding her padawan that she was, indeed, a fully functional woman, stopping three meters in front of him. “Unless of course, you came here so you could sample how the dark side freed me.” she purred, licking her lips in a slow fashion.

“No Master, that is not what I'm here for.” Jeff said, fighting off the temptation not to sample what his Master promised him. Barely. “I'm here because the Council is giving you one last chance, to show that you can be a Jedi and finish my training.”

“Jeff, the Jedi are SO stuck up.” Astrid sighed, folding her arms beneath her breasts. “The Dark Side is so much morrrre fun.” she purred again, and Jeff turned a slight shade of red, and she laughed.

“And I'm to assume that you have shared this fun with your new master?” Jeff's voice took on a dangerous edge, and even Astrid had to look at him twice. Jeff's eyes went cold as he demanded her for an answer.

“And why would you care if I did?” she asked, cautiously, all pretenses of seduction gone.

“I just do.” Jeff said, his tone turning the room to ice.

“Well,” Astrid said, actually managing to look embarrassed. “No, I have not. To tell the truth, I was saving that for you when you would follow me. But he is really good at other things, which he did teach me.” At the end of this, she licked her lips once more.

“Astrid,” Jeff said, gritting his teeth, but his muscles had relaxed. “I've come here to save you from your own damned foolish self.”

“And what makes YOU think that I need saving?” she asked, laughing. “I have never felt better in my life.”

“Then let us settle this by combat, and see if the dark has truly made you stronger.” Jeff said. “I'll only use one lightsaber.” and Jeff tossed his left one away, letting it scatter onto the floor.

Astrid sighed once more. “I was hoping you'd be reasonable about this. But since you're not, I'll just have to present your head to my Master, and hopefully he'll take something else from me.”

“Hard to do that Astrid. He's dead.” Jeff told her. “It's just you and me now, so be silent for once, and fight and lose.”

She lit her lightsaber, the crimson blade echoing off her face and began a slow stalk around Jeff, and he lit his, the brilliant silver blade bathing his whole body in light. Astrid rushed in, and Jeff put his left hand behind his back in the traditional fencing style that he had been taught for using his blade one-handed. The two lightsabers crashed together, creating sparks of light as they fought around the room, weapons weaving an intricate dance, the penalty of failure being death.

But, Jeff had weapons lessons with Master Windu, and he had been the only one to successfully land a hit on the weapons master when both were fighting at full strength and speed. Astrid had not known of these lessons, and Jeff was grateful for that, as she never would have fought him otherwise.

Slowly, Jeff began to press his advantage, forcing Astrid on the defensive. Again and again, Jeff pressed through her defense, and made it known that he could go through at any time. But Jeff wanted to take her alive, but then he saw his chance, bashing Astrid's crimson lightsaber out of the way, and using his telekinesis to pull it out of her hand when she reeled from his attack, as he tossed it up in the air, and used his lightsaber to cleave the dark weapon in two.

“It's over Master.” he said, not a trace of pride in his voice, but of finality.

“No it isn't!” she shrieked, launching herself at him, hands bared like claws. Jeff turned off his lightsaber in time, and instead of batting away the attack, like he normally would, he ducked and wound himself up between her arms, inside her defense; and when she least expected it, kissed her hard on the lips. Astrid was a little surprised, even more so by the blue flash of the stun bolt hitting her in the stomach. As she fell to the floor, Jeff holstered the pistol, one of Astrid's own weapons given to her by her father, at the small of his back.

Clipping his lightsabers to his belt, and pulling off his robe to wrap around his beloved master, Jeff pulled Astrid into his arms, and walked back over the splinters of the door which he had destroyed in coming in to save his master, and the one he loved.



Jeff sat bolt upright in his bed aboard Major Anya's craft, breathing hard and fast. Sweat rolled down his forehead and cheek, and he could feel that the bed that he lay upon was wet from his sweat. He wiped his brow, sat up against the wall, his wings moving forward to encompass him in a feathery blanket as he rested his head upon his knees, deep in thought.

[Quinn]

Gry was the one, she now realized, that Kathryn had been tracking, the rot in the Council. Unlike Anikin, who had been seduced by the Dark side out of love, Gry had gone dark willingly, and had fed his lust, even in the Temple itself. She recalled hushed stories of female padwans and learners gone missing. It was one reason the Coucil had not sanctioned Jedi missions to Coruscant-Under in many years.

Jeff's hard, fast breathing subsided as he realized what the nightmare was. It was the time where his Master had fallen, and he'd gone to rescue her. He brought her back to the council, and back to the Light Side itself. As a result, Master and Padawan were sent to be Diplomats for the Jedi. Jeff smiled at the many times that he and Astrid travelled to many different worlds, met many different cultures. And had to convince each and every one why they would want a Jedi temple on their planet.

Astrid stared at the wall, frowning. It looked like life itself was going to be Jeff's Knight's Test
She had dreaded his Test, knowing as she did that Gry intended it to kill Jeff, if possible. She had not known it, but she had been blind where Gry was concerned. He had been a slightly older classmate when she had come to the temple - already polished, and self-assured. Now, he was dead, at her hand. That he had been trying to kill her did not make Astrid feel any better about killing a fellow Jedi.

Jeff did not feel the same way about Gry. Jeff had known him since he was small and still living in the undercity, knowing him for the brutal rape of the women of the house which he lived at. Those women, although they did sell their bodies, Gry simply went too far, almost killing one until the Madam told him that he could not use the girls any longer.
Jeff did not feel remorse for Gry's death. But on the same token, he didn't feel glad either. It was one more death in the galaxy, and he felt that it was needed, sadly enough. Jeff had tried to contact Astrid, but got his brother instead. Quinn related what happened at the Temple, and that Astrid was still fine, physically. Psychologically, was something that she had to solve on her own.

Finally, Astrd swung her heels of the bed, and wobbled into the fresher. A few minutes later she was dressed and at the cockpit. "Quinn, can I talk to you?" she asked.

Quinn leaned back in the co-pilot's seat, looking at Astrid who from his viewpoint, was upside-down. "Sure. Bout what?"

She sat down. "Uh, I just feel weird, about Gry, that is. I've never killed using those blades before.

"Astrid, it's not about using those blades for killing. It's the killing itself." Quinn sat up, and turned the chair around. Please, sit down.

She sat. looking a bit queasy. She sat looking at her hands for a while. Finally, she looked up at Quinn. "He was trying to kill me. He would have killed me and then gone after Jeff. Why, Quinn? And why do I feel so guilty about killing him? I've had to shoot people with a blaster before, so why does this bother me? Is it because he was a Jedi, or a classmate?

"No, because you got to look into his eyes as he died." Quinn said, right then, very pointedly.

"Quinn, he thought he'd killed me. If I hadn't...." and she broke off, a bewildered look on her face. "Did I .....enjoy.....killing him?" She looked sickened.

"That is something you have to answer for yourself Astrid. But if it helps, you didn't kill him." Quinn told her. "You mortally wounded him, he was dying, but you didn't kill him."

"Technically, the shots did it - yes, I know, Quinn. But I can't escape my thoughts that way. The problem is - when I killed him, I felt glad. I still feel glad, Quinn. Glad that he's not alive anymore. Did I hate him THAT much?"

"Astrid, I don't think you were glad that HE died, but that the Darksider who was eroding the Council from within was dead." Quinn said. "Gry died once he took that step down the dark path. Some can be resurrected and brought back, but he chose not to."

She looked sad. "He was my friend, once. The he...changed, became more cold, more judgmental. I kept hoping that his old self would come back.

"You didn't kill Gry. You killed a Darksider. End of story." Quinn's face was set in stone.

"Yeah," she said. Rising, she repeated, "Yeah," and left in the direction of her cabin.

"Astrid, a bit of advice." Quinn told her just before she exited the cockpit.

"Yes?" she said.

"It's something that all of us did in the war." Quinn looked at her seriously. "Take everything that troubles you, that keeps you up at night. Put it all in a shoebox, and seal the lid. Open it up and deal with it when you feel you can."

She looked at him. "Displacement," she said finally. "Yeah, I'd forgotten that technique. Thanks, Quinn. Oh, and if Jeff calls,please let me know - wake me up if necessary.

"Why not call him yourself? I think he'd be happy that you did." Quinn shrugged.

"Because your brother asked me a question, and I need to think about it," she told him.

"Okay. Well, then I think he's gonna let you take your time about it. He's almost as patient as Kiri."

She stopped. "She asked you to marry her?" she said

"No, still waiting for her to ask." he said, and smiled broadly.

She looked at him. "Well, he did ask," she said.

"You? Well, that is something to think about." Quinn stroked his beard in thought. "But he is definitely sweet on you."

"Quinn, I don't know what to say," she said. "We're both Jedi, and Jedi don't marry. Don't even have relationships, although Gry...."

"Astrid, right now we can no longer hold up the old Jedi code, because it's caused us to lose many fine candidates for the Jedi." he said over his hands. "And the Jedi have been deal a serious blow. Where do you think we're going to get more Jedi?"

"But how will we hold to our standards of impartiality?" she said. "How can we help adjudicate when we might have family who are involved?"

"We do the best we can." Quinn told her. "Besides, police and military marry. Why should the Jedi be any different?"

"I don't know, Quinn. My own mother was a Jedi. She quit to have me, well, she quit to marry my father. And then she had me. They never would have given me to the Jedi, but that my talent was too strong..... I was tearing up the starship - from the inside."

"Well, I think that we can teach our own children on how to use the Force, or have our friends teach them. But people need love more than anything Astrid. I've learned not to underestimate that power, for it is capable of great things. Some terrible, some beautiful. One just has to be careful." Quinn told her. "Jeff loves you, truly loves you. You don't just toss that out the boarding ramp."

"I don't intend to , Quinn. It's just - I wasn't trained in that direction. Infacct I was carefully trained otherwise. So it takes some getting used to."

"Want some pointers?" he asked.

She came back in, and sat down. "Yeah?"

"Yes. Kiri?!" he called down the corridor. After a few seconds, she popped her head in. "You called?"

"Yes." said Quinn. "Astrid needs some pointers on relationsships and men in general, seeing as Jeff is interested in her."

Kiri nodded, and Quinn stood up to leave the room. "Seeing as this is girl talk, I don't think Kiri would want me to know her secrets." He winked at her, and to most of everyone's surprise, she blushed.
Astrid, seeing this, sighed. it looked pretty stupid to her.

Quinn exited, chuckling to himself.


He came back about an hour and a half later, carrying a tray of sandwiches to catch the tail end of one of Kiri's sentences. "... it's mostly in the hips, but wearing them makes you do it anyway. You just have to get used to walking in them."

"Well, I'm not gonna wear them," said Astrid. "Jeff would think I'd lost my mind. Oh, hi, Quinn. We were thinking about fashionable footwear.”

Quinn winced. "Sorry, to me that stuff looks painful." He set down the tray, and sat down in the communications seat. "I like the way they look and how they make the figure move, but how painful they must be to wear are always at the front of my mind. But you have to be a little crazy to be with this group." he shrugged, snatching a sandwich off the table, and taking a bite out of it.

Astrid took one, as did Kiri. "No, comment," she said.

"I guess the pain is relevant on the height itself." Quinn shrugged. "But as the guy in this conversation, if the woman can learn to walk like that whenever she wants to, all the better. And it's about the clothes, not the shoes anyway."

"Isn't it just about sex?" said Astrid quietly.

"That's what the clothes advertise, is how sexy you are, yes." Quinn said in-between bites. "But also, if you're on a date, if you can hold an intelligent conversation with your date, AND they're sexy, that's a good sign. And it depends greatly on the guy if they value the girl as a person, and not just something to try and score with."

"Score?" said Astrid, a question in her voice.

"Try to have sex with." Kiri explained. "It's another slang we talked about.

"But I don't think Jeff is the kind of person to think that you're just someone to try to have sex with and just drop. He values you as a person, and values your opinions." Quinn leaned forward onto his knees. "And you know him as well as he knows you."

"Yes," said Astrid. "Which is to say, not very well. I don't assume I know all of his responses."

Quinn raised an eyebrow. "One would think that after having been your padawan for almost twelve years now that you two would know each other to some point."

"Not all, but a lot more than most. We've learned what assumptions to NOT make," she said.

"True, but there's no denying that you two react well with each other when it gets down to it."
“Of course,” Astrid said with a certain smugness. "We're both Jedi."

"No Astrid, it's not that I'm talking about." Quinn looked her right in the eyes. "You two react to each other what took me and the rest of the squad YEARS to do."

[Quinn]

Quinn raised an eyebrow. "One would think that after having been your padawan for almost twelve years now that you two would know each other to some point."

"Not all, but a lot more than most."

"We've learned what assumptions to NOT make," she said.

"True, but there's no denying that you two react well with each other when it gets down to it."

"OF course, she said with a certain smugness. "We're both Jedi."

"No Astrid, it's not that I'm talking about." Quinn looked her right in the eyes. "You two react to each other what took me and the rest of the squad YEARS to do."

"It helps, having a link," she said, "and it helps that we have a common background."

"Other than that, I'm not sure what you mean, Quinn."

"I fail to see the link from growing up in the Temple and growing up in the Undercity..." Quinn said.

"You and Jeff have two radically different backgrounds." he explained.

"Originally, yes, but our training smoothed that away."

"Exactly." Quinn stated. "You and Jeff have bonded so completely that you feel what the other feels and know what the other thinks. And since that is true, why haven't you determined yourself how Jeff feels? Or why Jeff hasn't tried to do the same for you?"

"Just a thought." Quinn said, putting a sandwich into Astrid's hands, and began to chew on his own.

"It's ethics, Quinn. We Jedi have so little otherwise, we learned to respect each other's mental privacy. We learned to not-see. And after a while it becomes a pattern." She finally took a bite of the sandwich, then stared at it, brooding. "I guess that's how Gry and Anekin were able to get away with changing. We trusted each other..... too much." She set the sandwich down, and sat back, unsmiling.

"No such thing as trusting 'too much'. But that was them. This is about you and Jeff, and I don't think he would appreciate being compared to traitors." Quinn smiled.

"Ok, can you get to the point then?"said Astrid impatiently.

"To say it bluntly Astrid, I think you and Jeff would do well with each other. But do yourself a favor, and lay down ground rules that BOTH of you can agree to first." Quinn said.

Kiri looked at him. "Since when did you become a relationship expert?"

"Anyone can give advice on relationships except for their own." Quinn told Kiri.

"He's probably more of one than me, Kiri, if he's talking about love and romance. I've only seen them and advised on them from the outside, not the inside," said Astrid.

Kiri shrugged.

"But Astrid, the Jedi have been routed. There is no going around that." Quinn stated flatly. "And a goodly part of it was from our turning our relationship with the Force into more of a science instead of what it really is."

"Besides, I hate that midichlorian crap anyway. What we have is a gift, and if we adhere to the rules now, we WILL die out."

"You're preaching to the choir, Quinn," she said wearily. "Count does not a great Jedi make. Just like wars don't make great Jedi. ...............and there are no rules.....now

"Unless we missed it, one hell of a lot of Jedi just died senselessly. We have to start over. That is, of course, if we can survive whoever is hunting us. Kathryn should know... if she survived."

Then why the worry about Jeff?" Quinn asked her, tilting his head.

"Because he's my responsibility, until he passes his Knight's test, she said promptly.

"And once he passes his Knight's test?" Kiri asked.

"Then we will have to rethink our relationship," said Astrid. "I don't know how I will provide that Test, however. I can hardly call on the Council to state it, since I think that a good portion of the Council died, covering our retreat."

"I think the Force will do that for him." Quinn thought out loud, leaning back in his chair and staring up through the canopy at the swirling hyperspace.

"Yes," said Astrid, although she didn't look too happy over this. "I just hope he survives it."

"So do the rest of us, but he's a persistent person." Quinn said, and Kiri nodded. "But he's also a very patient person, which I think he is waiting for you to call him with your decision instead of bugging you about it."

"About what?" said Astrid. "About the fact he's said he loves me? I'm not going to discuss something THAT importaint over the hypercomms."

"It's the gesture Astrid." Kiri chimed in.

"Yes, he's backing off so you can think about it with nothing to disturb you from his end." Quinn nodded.

"Well, I'm thinking about it," she said, looking disturbed. "I'm not sure it's a good idea, but I'm thinking about it."

"Why do you think it's not a good idea?" Quinn asked.

"Because of who we were," she said. "He may be mistaking infatuation with love. I'm told it's common for students to fall in love with their teachers."

"Then determine what he feels."

"Quinn, why do you seem determined to push and challenge me?" Astrid asked him. "Is it because he's your brother?"

"No, but to make sure you don't fall in the same traps I've seen others do."

"Including you?" said Astrid pointedly.

"Including me." Quinn nodded.

She sighed. "O.K., then. I am thinking it through, and I will talk with him once we get where we are going." She looked at Quinn. "Is that what you wanted to hear?"


"So long as you follow through on your words, yes, it was." Quinn nodded once more.

Astrid stated to Kiri," No wonder you want to choke him sometimes - if he treats you like this - like a mental defective - sometimes."

"I find that he states exactly what's on his mind, and damn the consquences." Kiri said, snipingly.

"It also means I leave nothing to the imagination on what I mean during a conversation." Quinn added.

Astrid looked at them both, then shook her head. "I see......." was all she said.

"It infuriates others, yes." Quinn said. "So please forgive this old soldier."

"Right," said Astrid, flatly.

"And speaking of relationships," Quinn turned to Kiri. "When the hell are you going to ask me out? It's been a few years now."

"Well, you two iron out your relationship, and I'll tend mine."
"Goodnight you two," she added, looking at the two.


"Good night Astrid. Sleep well." Quinn stood, and hugged his friend. It was the first time he had in the several years of their partnership, but again, times were changing.

After glaring at Quinn, Kiri also hugged her.

"You could have asked me any time," she said to him.

Astrid just flinched, and left the room.

"And if I did, what might've happened?" he asked her, his eyes wide and curious.

"I might have said yes," she told him fierily.

"I guess I wasn't ready then." Quinn admitted. "But I am now."

She looked at him expectantly.

"Kiri, I'm ready to want to be with you. But the question is, do you want to be with me, now?"

"Most of the time - except when you're being exasperating,"she said

"Well, no one is perfect." Quinn shrugged his shoulders.

"Yeah, that's for sure," she said, and then she hugged him.

His arms wrapped around her tightly, as he set his head on her shoulder.

[Morris Cutler]

*As Gavin took one last glance at the sleeping Callista he backed out of the room, nearly bowling over John Harkness.*

"M..Master Harkness, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to run into you."

"Next time maybe you should look where you are walking then." his voice carried a strong amusement with it, no anger.

"I..I was just making sure she was ok."

"Attachment is forbidden, you know this Gavin. You can't allow yourself the luxury of falling in love with someone, or worse yet convincing yourself you are in love with someone. It will lead down the dark path."

"With all due respect Master, our entire world has just been brought down around our feet, I would think now is the time we should be trying to cling to whatever hope we can find, in whatever way that might be."

"It was attachment that seduced Anakin Skywalker, that seduced Gry. I will not stand by and watch you seduced also."

"So that's it then, you think I am incapable of resisting the darkside, you think I am like my father, always toeing the line. You're wrong about me UNCLE, I serve the lightside, the Jedi, but with the shattering of the order, and the Jedi council as we know it, I have to hold onto hope."

"It's a fool's hope child, love is a wasted emotion, designed to entangle us in a web of darkness forever. It tempts us, refuses to let us go. It binds us into knots and causes conflict. Nothing good can come from love."

"You're so wrong Master, love is one of the greatest emotions you can embrace. You're just sore because Master Kathryn never loved you back, the way that you loved her. It's made you bitter, all you can do is quote platitudes and reasons why love will make me fall, it won't you have to believe I am stronger than that."

*It was entirely the wrong thing to say, John's eyes glazed over with that faraway look and his face contorted in anger as this mere child called him out.* "Boy you're impossible, just like your father was. I have half a mind to give you a whipping you'll never forget. When your father died he charged me with the task of looking after you, but I will not be talked to like one of your teenage friends. Apologize now"

"Master Harkness, I apologize for the tone, but not it's meaning. You have got to stop living in the past, you have got to move on. I am leaving now, I need to center myself."

*John leapt across the hallway, blocking Gavin's exit vector his blue lightsaber coming into his hand, igniting with a snap-hiss.* "You'll leave when I am finished."

"THIS IS RIDICULOUS UNCLE, STAND DOWN, I MEAN NO HARM." *Gavin's Green Lightsaber came to his hand and reluctantly he snapped it on, holding it in a high guard keeping a 6 meter gap between himself and his uncle.*

"I have no desire to fight here, I just want to meditate but I won't stand idly by and let you dictate what path I am to follow either. You are not acting a Jedi Master right now, your crossing the line you are so quick to condemn my father for toeing. Don't you see it, this is madness. Focus, breathe, a Jedi acts only when at peace with the force, you know...."

*Gavin's blade came down at an angle intercepting John's Blue Lightsaber at chest level as he set his feet to parry. Reflecting back of the blue lightsaber Gavin pushed foward driving John's blade into a defensive posture, dancing his way in and out of John's circle of influence. Using his smaller stature and quickness to counter-attack each stroke.*

*Slicing upward John drove at Gavin's head, as Gavin brought his blade up horizontally to parry the stroke. Lashing out in quick succession with his right foot, planting his heel square into the right knee of his uncle, who grimaced and stumbled backwards.*

*Gathering himself up for another offensive burst, using the pain to fuel his strokes John drove foward only to find himself caught in a web of force energy, suspended in place by the force skills of Jedi Master Shaak Ti.*

"What is going on here."

*John spoke. "Nothing, I was just teaching my nephew a little about respect."

"Teaching through aggression, Master Harkness you of all people should now how dangerous that practice can be. Fear, Anger, Aggression, all tools of the darkside. I think you need to go to your cabin and simmer down, spend some time in meditation. You as well Padawan Spry. These are dark times, more than anything we need to stick together, not fight. Infighting will throughly destroy us. Now I am going to let you go now, but go to your cabin and meditate."

"Understood" his fury subsided and he switched off the lightsaber clipping it back to his belt, and walking off in the other direction, settling into his cabin moments later.*

*Shaak Ti turned to Gavin and smiled.* "Patience Padawan, he'll come around. I won't probe into what the tension was becase right now it isn't my place, but next time please try to handle it without resprting to combat."

"Yes Master Ti, I will." *he managed a sheepish grin and strode back to his cabin, immersing himself in the force, meditating.*

[Quinn]

"Well, he got a few things wrong..." spoke someone quietly in the shadows of the ship. A man with blonde hair, green eyes and wearing coveralls with various mechanic's tools hanging out of the pockets.

Timothy had watched Harkness's battle with young Gavin, but had not intervened. it would have been innapropriate to do so, which is why he was disappointed when Master Ti intervened.

He mused over the new information, that Harkness secretly nursed a soft spot for Master Darkflame, his soon to be wife. Well, providing that she said yes to his question. But as she was pregnant with twins at the moment, Timothy's twins, he didn't see how she could say no.

"Love doesn't lead to the dark side. Passion can lead to rage and fear, and can be controlled, but passion is not the same thing as love. Controlling your passions while being in love, that's what they should teach you to beware, but love itself will save, not condemn you." Timothy quoted a very old saying from a very old Jedi Padawan who lived during the time of Exar Kun.

And he walked down the hall towards the hangar bay, where his ship sat, and where he hoped Kathryn would ambush him for another round of good lovemaking.

[Quinn]

But Katnryn was sleeping, twisting in nightmares fed from the deaths of others. In her dreams, she sheltered two babies in her arms, sheltering them from the screamsand dying that exhoed in the Force. She heard cries for help that went unanswered, shocked yells of disbeliefe and horror as Clones turned on their former Generals.

Timothy opened the door to their cabin, and closed it with a soft hiss, locking it behind him. He slowly removed the dirty coveralls, tossing them in the direction of the washer, and went into the fresher. Kathryn didn't like dirty men. Dirty-minded men, maybe.

Her eyes opened, and she cried out, inarticulate, mourning the deaths of her brothers and sisters, her arms wrapped around herself, sheltering then children whose existence she had just learned of. Her face, thin and exhausted looking, was covered by the tracks of tears as she cried openly for the first time in her life

Timothy was there, heavy blaster pistol raised in the air, ready for action. Never mind the fact that he was stark naked and with water running down his muscle-toned chest. As soon as he saw Kathryn, he walked over to her, set the weapon on the nightstand, and sat down on the bunk. "Anything I can do to help?" As he drew close to her, the constant shouting and screaming from the Force ceased, along with her ability to use the Force.

She sighed with relief, sitting up and shivering. "Nothing......nothing we can do, Timothy. I'm just hearing what I can't prevent, what I could have prevented if I'd been quicker" She was still crying, but she spoke in a eerily calm voice, almost clinically dispassionate.

"It could have been much worse Master Darkfalcon." Timothy pulled one leg up to his chin, studying her with his green eyes. "You could not have made it at all, and the slaughter at the Temple would have been much worse."

She twisted to look at him. "It's worse than it should have been," she said finally. "If I'd have had the guts to present to the Council my suspicions, instead of waiting for solid facts on everything..... IF I hadn't though I was - finally - going over the edge of sanity....If I....."she quieted and looked at him. "If I had realized that those dreams of loving you weren't Just fantasies, Protector Qixonis... If I......" she stopped, shivering, "If I hadn't been dreaming of my own death," she said finally.

"Everyone has nightmares Master Darkfalcon. We could have lost so much more than just most of the Knights and Council. We could have lost all the younglings. You haven't seen those clonetroopers. They follow orders. ANY orders given to them."

She was still shivering, looking grey and shocky. "I Know. I dreamed - one shot me in the head - and I died. I did die, would die, died, right about now." Her teeth were chattering.

Timothy reached and pinched her cheek.

She didn't react, and her skin felt cold and clammy. Suddenly she wrapped her arms around him, thin arms, as cold as a ghosts. "I......I.....am..........alive, she whispered to herself."

"Yes, and I think you need some food." Timothy scratched her head. "But Kathryn, I have a serious request of you."

"What?" she said, swinging her feet off the bed and swaying as she stood.

Timothy held her hands to steady her, and looked her in the eyes. It was appropriate, her standing. Slowly, he slipped to his knees in front of her. "You are carrying my children." he stated. "And, I would like to care for them, and you."

"But you do see to me," she said. And you help me. What would be different?"

"Nothing, except perhaps a name change." he smiled up at her. "Kathryn, my love, will you take my hand in marriage?"

She went white in shock. "You......LOVE ....me?" she stuttered, and then she fainted.

It was only by the the fact that Timothy was close by that he caught her at all. Timothy looked down at Kathryn, eyes wide. "I guess it was something I said..."

[Quinn]

She woke up in the morning, after a quiet sleep. There was an unaccustomed warmth next to her, but she smiled quietly recognizing timothy's scent and the fact he'd but her to bed again. She had probably had one of her fits. Around him, the psychic noise that surrounded her life seemed to mute to a bearable roar.

Timothy was not asleep, but his breathing was steady and relaxed next to Kathryn. The arm on which her head rested wove down to cover the top of her chest, and the other arm held her just under her breasts. His warm breath heated the back of her neck. He wasn't asleep, but instead almost seemed to be in a trance, more like twilight sleep, in between consciousness and resting slumber.

"Timothy," she said quietly, her voice a question. "How long have we been sleeping together like this?" In her mind, she was thinking about dreams that might not have been dreams, dreams that in her waking time she put down to wistful thinking or growing proof of her lack of sanity.

"Sleeping like this? Or making love with each other?" he asked softly.

"Both," she said quietly, her mind for once at peace with itself. "After all, I did get pregnant somehow. And with that fact, I think I'm glad I never decided to take my suspicions to the council. It would have made a terrible scandal."
"To tell the truth, it's been going on for quite some time." Timothy started. "The first time was when you came onto the ship dressed in your 'lower Coruscanti' disguise, as you put it. We didn't make love, but I still wonder to this day how you learned to use your lips in such a wondrous way."
"But the sleeping in the same bunk, that's been going on for quite a few months now. Technically, about six months ago."

She raised up on one elbow and looked at him. "Didn't you know that I thought I was crazy and hallucinating and about to invoke your Final Clause?" she said.

"No. And I could've provided proof that you weren't crazy. Quite easily." He cracked an eye open and looked up at her. "It would've gotten you thrown out of the Order, but I would have gone with you."

"How?" she said, then blushed. "OH....lack of virginity.......quite a simple proof, really, IF I had thought to check."

"Indeed it is." he said, rolling onto his back and gently pulling Kathryn down to rest upon him. "But over the years, I have grown to like you, and eventually love you. I believe it to be love, and not lust. For if it was lust, that would have been satisfied long ago."

"Indeed it would have been," she said, and rested her head on his shoulder. "But how did you dare in the first place? And why? I don't recall asking you, in or out of hallucination....."

"No, I didn't. Not verbally, anyway." Timothy smiled. "You gave it willingly to me, to help ease my stress. And once I walked in on you while you were touching yourself to relieve your own stress. The problem was, you weren't achieving what you normally could. So, I decided to help you along. And one thing led to another..."

"That....that was recently....." she said, remembering a particularly vivid dream. "And that lead to.....pregnancy?"

"I guess it did. That wasn't the only time we did it." Timothy stroked her head gently. "But I love you very much. You're pregnant, with my children on top of it. And I am asking for your hand in marriage."

"Marriage? A Jedi, marry? Do a Bindo? Uh......" she stammered out, her mind racing over the possibilities.

"You don't have to leave the Order Kathryn. Right now, you're the only Council member left alive. But we do need to set a new precedent, and the ways of trying to ignore the emotions that the Force itself gives us are foolish at best."

"My answer is - yes." she said, looking at him.

Timothy smiled broadly. "Thank you Kathryn." and hugged her tightly.

[LazyMatt]

OOC Side Note: Shaak TI was on the council too haha.

[erickson]

*Gavin had finished meditating, and with renewed strength had headed out into the hall of the ship looking for something to keep him occupied. His fight with Harkness was still horrifying in ways. He felt John was closer to the darkside than he wanted to admit, and that wasn't a comforting thought. He would eventually have to speak with Master Ti about it, and see what he could do, but for now he tried to put it out of his mind.*

Callista awoke feeling unsettled. In her dreams she had been back in the temple, watching Jedi fight Jedi, but with deadly purpose. She had decided to help with the smallest Younglings as a way of reassuring herself that they were safe.

She also needed to think about Gavin. Her feelings toward her fellow Padawan were confusing to her.

*Gavin had found himself wandering non-chalantly into the small lounge that the Jedi onboard shared, he glanced around and noticed no one currently in the room, so he slid in and brought up a holographic chart of the galaxy and tried to mentally picture the route that they were taking. He didn't know where but their path was leading them somewhere he had never been. He couldn't really focus though, his thoughts kept wandering towards Callista, the word love echoing in his mind. Cautiously he made sure John wasn't around while he battled with that topic in his head.*

Callista soon found herself learning to change a baby diaper. While the babies were CUTE, their output wasn't, but help was needed

So she was quickly drafted, and wound up trying to settle the messiness.

*Gavin sat comfortably in the highbacked chair closest to the back wall, he found himself calming at the thought of Callista, he got the vague sense of babies, which made him blush considerably. Way too early to be thinking about that he thought. Maybe they could talk about things, it never hurt. John's rashness still had him shaken, but he found Callista was never too far from his mind.*

She was finally relieved on changing duty and told to get a shower, food and rest, in that order, and to come back again tomorrow. she was dragging out the corridor when she ran into Gavin.

*Gavin found himself wandering again what she was doing, but was interrupted by one of the younglings entering the room. Micah was his name, Gavin was sure.* "Sorry Masta Spy I didn't know anyun in hewe." "Your fine Micah, but I'm not a master, just Gavin, or Padawan Spry." "You know my name, I happy now, can u get me a drink." "Sure" *he handed him an orange colored juice and the boy ran out happy.* *Absent-mindedly Gavin smiled then looked when Callista walked in.* "You know even smelling like baby poo you still know how to take my breath away." *it sounded corny but she knew he meant it*

She shook her head. "I smell like baby poo because I've been changing babies. I'm getting a shower and going t bed. Wanna help me with the babies tomorrow?"

"Um....Sure, although that should be entertaining. Imagine me Baby Masta Gavin Spry" he stood up striking a comical holo-drama superhero pose, his own attempt at humor. "Things are changing, it feels like we are being left floundering. It's painful to some extent, but we're supposed to be at peace am I right."


"We should be at least trying," she said. Neither Master Ti nor Master Darkflame have any suggestions'

"I am clinging to whatever I can to bring peace, I guess in a way, you are my peace. I find myself often thinking about you now, holding on to the one person I know I can count on. I can't even really count on my Uncle anymore, I think he is going crazy in someway, I am having these harrowing visions that he is gonna fall to darkness, and that I am powerless to stop it." *he kept a tight lock on what had happened earlier in the day, not even his best friend and whole world could penetrate that lock.*

"I think it hit the grownups worse than us,' said Callista. "Imagine being ancient like master erickson or master harkness, and having the universe you counted on change around you. It must be AWEFUL!"

"Especially the latter, he's convinced that nothing is right and that everyone is gonna fall to the darkside. Its making him paranoid, and he's treading closer to it than he even realizes. Problem is I feel I am powerless to help him. I guess I need to let him go do his own thing. Stop worrying so much. The darkside is planting doubt inside my mind. Padawan Whie was telling me about that feeling, it's kinda scary."

[Quinn]

((Hmmmm. The High Council let a person with an extreme predatory personality onto the Council. VERY interesting indeed. If that's the case, then as far as they know, Kathryn and Shaak Ti are the only High Council members left alive...))

[Morris Cutler]

*John sat in guarded meditation, the force swirling in him, a new level of tension in his demeanor. His fight with his nephew had left him with a sense of wounded pride. The interference of Shaak Ti had really irritated him.*

-Love is evil, it is of the darkside. Love shamed you, they shamed you. Disappear, Disappear from their ranks. They want you not. They are determined to humilate you, I heard them talking about it. Gavin wants to humilate you, to reduce your credibility for the way you despised his father.-

-Who the F**k are you, how do you claim to know so much, reveal yourself.-

-My dear Johnny Boy, I am who I am. I am he who can release you from the burden of responsibility. Release you from the pain you feel inside. Steal away, follow your instincts, they will bring you to me.-

-Why should I, what good does it gain me.-

-What good does it profit a man who gains the whole world yet loses his soul. I have insights, insights into the psyche of the Jedi Order. I can instruct you in the ways you can instruct Gavin to resist the pull of love. He is going to fall to the darkside because of it. Together though we can stop it, just come to me.-

-Love is of an evil nature, you are right. Teach me how to save my nephew from falling. I will join you soon.-

*moments later the ship exited hyperspace at the next set of coordinates. WIth a quick slight of hand John Harkness convinced the hangar operators that he was on an important fact finding mission for the Jedi Order and quickly dropped a YT-1300 out of the hangar and sped away before anyone realized he was gone.*

*Programming in a set of jump coordinates, the Jedi Master shot off into hyperspace bound for the call of the one. *

*Moments later the Jedi Remnant ship reentered hyperspace bound for it's next coordinates.*

*and somewhere beneath the surface Gavin felt pain, and sat bolt upright, a cold sweat breaking out on his forehead. Something was coming, his uncle was in trouble.*

*Somewhere in a darker corner of the galaxy Najus Naugg smiled to himself.*

"Soon John Harkness you will know pain beyond your wildest dreams, the pain I felt at your brothers hand when he took away my whole world. You will come to me, and through my subtle ability fall to the darkside. Then he will come, believing he can save you, and I will watch as you are forced to cut down your own flesh and blood. Then I will cut you down and my revenge will be complete. MY happily ever after is coming."

[Morris Cutler]

*John brought his ship out near the point at where he felt the presence of the person calling to him. It was a station he noted. A Waypoint on the galaxy map.*

"I suppose I can call it Waypoint" he thought aloud.

*Hissing, the drive brought the ship onto the pad of the station and John stepped out, his hand on his lightsaber's hilt.*

"I have come, who are you, where are you."

"I am inside, call me the one."

*JOhn stepped into the darkened entrance to the abandoned space station and looked around. Bringing his vision into focus he was greeted by a talking apparation.*

"Welcome Jedi Master, welcome to the new school. I am going to give you some advice before we start. You want him to stop loving then you have to beat it out of him. Look what she did to you, how she broke your heart. Love is evil, dwell on that for a moment."

*And dwell on it John did. His grief and anger poured into the room and his face took on a paler hue. Darkness began to swirl around him as he spent days dwelling on it, all the while believing that he was on the right course of action.*

*After a few days of dwelling he spoke finally.* "So when do I teach him not to love?"

"You call to him, and when he comes you beat love out of him, this time there will be no one to stop you. When you call, oh he will come, count on that. First though you must become strong enough in your conviction. Keep dwelling on the pain you felt. Only by making him understand that pain can you ever hope to be successful."

"This all seems so...radical..but you're the Master I will do as you instruct."

*and John settled back into meditation dwelling deeply on his anger, and his grief.*

*Najus enjoyed the satisfaction he got from watching the Jedi Master fall also. It was only the beginning.*